The…View…Is…Awesome. We arrived this afternoon in Seminole Canyon State Park. It is a wild and beautiful desert place. Hushedly quiet except for the occasional animal noise and the murmurs of a few camping neighbors.
Tonight it is dark…really dark. And the stars are plentiful. It is exciting and a just a teeny bit scary to be here. Tomorrow we will go on a hike not available without the park ranger to guide you. There are ancient pictographs painted in the canyons. And big signs warning of snakes…
I have been reflecting, in between the care and feeding of children, on what happened to make me so fearful of the wilds. I remember sitting, running and playing for hours in the woods as a child. And well into my teen years we would race down the sandy trail to our nearby swimming hole to be the first one in the cold refreshing water. We would float down the river on our bellies to a natural whirlpool and relished the currents that carried us. We would sit in a cornfield in the dark, playing corn tag. Our dreams and youth pushed the boundaries of our fears. Now I go in the water like an old maid, slowly and reluctantly…that’s if it’s pool water. If it is wild water, like the ocean, I proceed with more heightened caution. I am content to just walk along the shore and get my feet wet. And as much as Nate is excited about Big Bend National Park, the ultimate wild place…I match his excitement with an equal amount of dread.
Anyway, I don’t like the state I am in, I don’t like realizing I have lost a lot of my ability to be child like and playful. I don’t want to be accused of dying of boredom before I die from adventure. But for now all I can do is chip away at the mountain with my little chisel. And be brave in the ways that I can.